It is more fun in the Philippines. Except when the eye of a super-typhoon is heading straight for you at 130mph.
But more on our brush with Typhoon Pablo later. First, I've got an amazing two-week holiday to cover off.
Kate and I, following a courtship of only four months, decided to head to the other side of the world on holiday. Having spent a maximum of 36hrs in each other's company at any one time, the holiday was in some respects a test of compatibility. You find out a lot about someone when you're sat next to them on a plane for 14 hours...
I'd read several recommendations of the Philippines, and a region called Palawan in particular. In fact, the Lonely Planet timed the release of their 10 Best Regions In The World in 2013 perfectly - picking Palawan at No.8.
In an ideal world you'd give the Philippines more than two weeks. Factoring in 3-4 days travelling to and from the country from the UK and some internal plane-hopping, you're not left with a huge amount of time. But two weeks is what we had, and we definitely made the most of it.
Our route out there was London - Amsterdam - Taipei - Manila. We left London City on the Friday afternoon, landing at Schipol an hour later. We both had hand luggage only which meant no danger of bags being lost in transit, but it did necessitate the now-familiar faffing around with transparent plastic bags and liquid toiletries under 100ml.
I always find it a bit impersonal to be standing in a queue of strangers holding the contents of your bathroom cabinet in your hand for all to see.
'Ooh look, he uses Johnson's Baby Shampoo and he's in his mid-thirties. How funny!'
Once the security check had been negotiated (for the second time in a couple of hours), we were soon on our big KLM plane heading east. I'd made sure to book a night flight going out, and both of us managed a bit of sleep - never a given when you're in economy.
The KLM food was excellent, I managed to fit in a viewing of the moody Dark Night Rises (Kate chose the more light-hearted, but smutty, Ted) and before we knew it we'd traversed the world and were coming in to land in Taipei - the capital of Taiwan.
Taipei was a strange stop. We landed, gathered our bags and left the plane, went through security (for the third time), walked round the corner, went back to the same gate we'd just left and got back on the plane. A total of half an hour. In that time they'd cleaned the plane, changed cabin crew and we'd picked up and dropped off a few passengers.
Back on the plane and we were soon underway on the final leg: the two-hour journey south to Manila.
We landed in Manila jaded but ok, considering we'd left the UK at 4pm on Friday and it was now 8pm on Saturday. Literally the first thing we saw after passing the passport check was a big squashed cockroach on the floor. A sign of things to come?
We left Arrivals and experienced the sticky Asian heat for the first time as we headed for the taxi rank. A slight kerfuffle later, where we had to get on the phone to the hotel and chase up our pre-booked taxi, and we were safely in the back of an air-conditioned car driving through the traffic-laden streets of Manila.
The journey to the Nichols Airport Hotel wasn't far, but gave us a first glimpse of Filipino life. Flashing Christmas decorations lined the pavement as we pulled away from the airport, Jeepneys (more on them later) honked their horns and continually cut each other up, huge billboards advertising videoke machines, condos and other aspirational goods towered overhead.
My one regret about our stay in the Nichols Airport Hotel was not taking a photo of our room. It was a bizarre affair featuring a standard-sized bedroom area (bed, TV, table etc), a bath in one corner and next to it a toilet.
The bath had no privacy curtain - perfect for exhibitionists and for people who get lonely while they're having a bath. The toilet was sectioned off by a shoulder-high wall and a saloon door.
By the time we'd checked in and freshened up it was getting late, so there was only time for a quick Sprite on the rooftop bar (great views over Manila's twinkling lights) before bed. In the morning I got a quick picture of the city's skyscraping commercial hub before breakfast:
Our first Filipino breakfast would turn out to be our worst:
Mmm, just what I was after. Two bits of warm bread with half-cooked eggs and cucumber, plus strawberry jam as an accompaniment (just out of shot). Give me more.
Luckily that culinary delight wouldn't linger long in our thoughts as we were soon on the way back to the airport to catch an internal flight from Manila to Palawan.
We'd booked the flights with Cebu Pacific Air at a cost of about £25 each - a bargain that got the thumbs-up from me:
We enjoyed a brief hour-long journey over the West Philippine Sea to the capital of the Palawan region, Puerto Princesa.
Our base in PP, for one night only, was the quirky Deep Forest Garden Inn. It had a mixture of bungalows and rooms around a central swimming pool and restaurant, with a strange collection of life-size plastic animals, warrior kings and other dayglo ornaments littered about.
As one reviewer on Trip Advisor put it: 'a place designed by someone on an acid trip'.
There was an upside-down Christmas tree hanging from the ceiling in reception...
...a soldier riding a horse through a flowerbed:
And a couple of lovers bursting through an oversized bamboo stalk:
You don't get that in the Premier Inn.
We had a nice lunch, lazed by the pool (both activities we'd soon get used to) and before long evening was upon us. We decided to experience our first ride on a Filipino 'tricycle', which was essentially a motorbike with a small room strapped to it.
The passenger seat was enough for one fat person or possibly one slim adult and one child, not two normal-sized adults. But we squished in for the bouncy 10-minute ride into the main Rizal Street of Puerto.
After a quick reccy of the town's main strip, we took a safe option for dinner - a European-style 'trattoria' where we ate chicken and pork belly and had some proper fresh fruit juice for the first time.
The plan was to stay in PP for one night, as a way to charge batteries after the mammoth journey from London via Manila, before moving north. So in the morning we got another tricycle through the streets of Puerto to the bus terminal.
We got there to find a wasteland with some ramshackle garages and warehouses dotted about. There were various buses, jeepneys and vans on offer, with names of locations like Roxas and El Nido stuck on the front.
We headed to the garage that took people to Sabang, our next destination, and realised we'd just missed a van departure. The next one would be in 1.5hrs, so we settled down in the shade (still stifling hot), bought some snacks and waited.
Once in the van, we had a job batting off several mosquitoes and protecting our knees from bashing the seats in front. Legroom, and comfort in general, was at a premium.
But we were soon on our way and had a pleasant 3-4 hr trip north to Sabang, on Palawan's west coast. November-December is a great time to visit the Philippines, not least because it is just after the rainy season and all the green forests and palm trees are at their luscious best.
Sharing our van were a couple of German travellers, Kevin and Sabina. They were a pleasant pair, on a similar itinerary to us, and it was to be the first of three journeys we shared with them.
We arrived in Sabang around lunchtime on Monday. It's a small town, just a row of small shops leading towards a central square and a strip of hotels and bungalows along the beach. Straight away it seemed like what we were after: a place to relax and do very little for a couple of days.
Our base there was a fantastic resort called Daluyon. We'd been warned by the owners that the place was under construction, as they were throwing up some new bungalows in order to cope with the increased demand from tourism. But in the event, despite the building site being next to our bungalow we barely noticed it.
The resort was just what you'd want in a tropical island paradise: luxurious room, a veranda overlooking palm trees, a white sand beach and blue sea beyond, a massive pool, a fantastic restaurant, great staff. I could go on.
The day after we arrived we took a trip to the main tourist draw of Sabang: the Undeground River. It has recently got itself on a (paid for?) list of the New Natural Wonders of the World, and the Palawan authorities are clearly positioning it as the primary reason for visitors to come to the region.
We got a bangka (a catameran-style boat, ubiquitous in the Philippines) across the bay to a small cove, where we were dropped off on beach, given some funky safety gear and then led through to an inland bay where we got in a canoe.
Say cheese!
The Underground River is over 8km long, winding through a series of stalactite-laden caves. I was given the task of holding the flashlight, the only source of light once you enter the river and are plunged into eerie darkness.
There were some fascinating sights inside: rock formations that resembled root vegetables; cathedral-like caves reaching 60-70ft up into the darkness; centuries-old passageways leading to god knows where.
Throughout our 45 minute trip we were urged to keep our mouths closed, especially when looking up, as there were thousands of bats on the ceilings of the caves, regularly depositing their shit onto unsuspecting tourists below.
Our guide, something of a comedian, enjoyed telling us that the drip, drip, drip of wet liquid onto us could either be water or bat crap. Oh, how we laughed.
After emerging blinking into the sunshine following the tour, we were led back through to the cove where we we'd originally arrived. Along the way we were taken to an opening in the forest where we came across several metre-long monitor lizards and monkeys bouncing around.
The afternoon back in Sabang was one great hardship: sitting on a secluded pristine beach in 30-degree heat, being brought chilled fruit juices and reading a good book.
We loved Sabang. So much so that we tried to stay an extra night at Daluyon; unfortunately they were full. It's the sort of place that will probably change significantly in the next 20 years once international flights start landing in Palawan (an airport is under construction in El Nido, further north).
So it was with slightly heavy hearts that we boarded a boat the following morning (having arranged a bangka hire with the Germans) north to Port Barton.